monkeycrap's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort here.

Spend all your time waiting for that second chance,
for a break that would make it okay.

There's always some reason to feel not good enough,
and it's hard, at the end of the day.

In the arms of the angel,
fly away from here,
from this dark, cold hotel room,
and the endlessness that you feel.

You are pulled from the wreckage,
Of your silent reverie.
You're in the arms of the angel,
may you find some comfort here.

So tired of the straight line,
and everywhere you turn,
there's vultures and thieves at your back.

The storm keeps on twisting.
Keep on building the lies
that you make up for all that you lack.

Don't make no difference,
escape one last time.
It's easier to believe in this sweet madness,
Oh, this glorious sadness,
that brings me to my knees.

Sarah McLachlan - Angel

Uncle passed away yesterday. He was 57, looking forward to retirement when the illness struck, didn't really get to see much of life as a result. From what I know, his entire life consisted of much, much more thorns than roses. I shall not elaborate further out of respect. His last words to me, the last time I visited him in the hospital, as tears streamed from his eyes, were, "I just want everybody to be happy. Please. Just for everybody to be happy."

Hmm. So we balmy-breeze through life combing for happiness, only to eventually want others to find it? Or is it the other way round, helping others search for theirs before we can find ours? Or is the concept of happiness an illusion, the more you want it, the more you won't get it, not unlike an oasis in the desert?

Anyway. Was thinking about the whole notion of fairytale romances and whether it is actually possible for it to happen. Well I get fairytale romances all the time. Just pay $9.50 at GV, Cathay or Shaw and I get an instant fairytale romance. Anyway. I personally feel that any true blue romance, so long as it is not conceived in ah geok's matchmaking agency or luap-luap premium fantasy services private limited, should be kind of fairytaley in itself.

How bout the hollywood kinds, where either a)nerd gets girl, b)loser gets girl, c)kind, innocent guy gets girl, d)poor guy gets rich girl, e)guy travels half the world to find girl, f)musician gets girl, g)ugly guy gets girl or h)batman gets girl?

In physics, a gas behaves ideally with low pressure and high temperature. For hollywood fairytale romances to occur ideally, I believe that the conditions are low expectations and high hopes. High hopes cos you need to be hopeful for one to happen. Take me for example, I'm full of hope. Everytime I go to the atm to withdraw cash, there's always a glimmer of hope, this spark inside me that believes that one day, the machine will dispense $1000 instead of $10 bills. See? Hopeful what! And of course low expectations. How to get fairytale romances if you upgrade from knight in shining armour to knight in shining 1962 Ferrari 250 GTO?

All those hoping for fairytale romances, all the best! Me included abit also la heh. All those who are not, if you need the number for ah geok's matchmaking agency just ask me.

C, 2 counts. D,E flat, one count each. A flat, 4 counts. G, 5 counts. That was my first euphonium solo. The Batman theme. Simple solo, but bloody nerve-wrecking playing it to a packed ac auditorium. To a poor sec one, starting "batman soundtrack highlights" with this solo was pure torture. I was so scared that I felt the piss in my bladder crescendo and decrescendo-ing with the solo. Heh. Just got reminded of it while watching batman begins. Great movie by the way. Loved Liam Neeson's acting.

I'm off now, going to my uncle's wake. Later.

9:55 a.m. - 2005-06-26

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next