monkeycrap's Diaryland Diary

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\"The words of wise men are heard in quiet more than the cry of him that ruleth among fools.\"--Ecc 9:17

Hey. It's been a pretty long time. Plenty of things have happened, mostly mundane stuff, like going out with vong and catface on a racist joke marathon, and getting an x-ray on my nagging back injury. Turns out i have a slight scoliosis in the thoraco-lumbar region with concavity towards the right side, ie. scoliosis centering ar T6/T7 convexing on the right side. To put it simply, i'm abnormal, but still fit enough to undergo 2.5 years in hell, otherwise known as pulau tekong. Damn.

Revision's bad. Pace is picking up, but it's too late to do anything now. I've given up on any hopes of doing well and beaming from ear to ear upon receiving the results. I'm just trying to salvage what would be a hopeless situation. Hopefully at the end of it all, everything'll be ok. I'm sure it will. It has to be.

Will stop complaining here. After all, the prelims ain't really that important. There's still the bigger obstacle to overcome (the a levels, not binny). And i've nothing to prove to no one. Actually frankly speaking, in this scenario, i'd rather my parents get pissed if i don't do well. Cos if i don't do well, my mum will go, "*sigh* it's ok, you've done your best. Do better next time k?" Yes yes i know, lucky me, but i'll feel damn bad and guilty! For, like, using their money, eating and staying at home for free, etc...and ending up disappointing them like that.

And i think that exponential face has a problem. I mean, other than the exponential face, which is obvious. She's ruining my friend's (her bf's) life by being a control freak and getting perpetually pissed. I feel so sorry for my friend. Wish i could do something bout it. But as they say, love is blind. And now she thinks that i'm, ahem, u know, un-straight. Ok i admit, sometimes i do make jokes bout this kind of stuff. So i can't blame shallow superficial people for thinking that way. But her basis for her "accusation" is that i was her bf's close friend before they were attached. My gosh. That's more pathetic than her moon face! Maybe she doesn't want attention taken away from her bf. Please lah, with that face of yours, complemented with cubic dandruff, you can have all the attention you want. People use your chin as the bulls eye for those "flip-a-coin" funfair games. Maybe if you stop getting angry the whole year round(it's true, she pmses more than she smses every month), and actually cut the bimbo attitude(which is so obviously fake due to the cheena-ness of every word you say), then life'll be better for you.

Now i feel bad. Will delete the previous paragraph soon. After the rest of the world reads it. Must destroy all evidence. Ok will end here.

Hey lady, you lady

cursing at your life

You're a discontented mother

and a regimented wife

I've no doubt you dream about

the things you'll never do

But,

I wish someone had talked to me

like I wanna talk to you.....

Ooh I've been to Georgia and California

and, anywhere I could run

I took the hand of a preacher man

and we made love in the sun

but I ran out of places

and friendly faces

because I had to be free

I've been to paradise

but I've never been to me...

Please lady, please, lady

don't just walk away

'cause I have this need to tell you

why I'm all alone today

I can see so much of me

still living in your eyes

won't you share a part

of a weary heart

that has lived million lies.......

Ooh I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece

while I've sipped champagne on a yacht

I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo

and showed 'em what I've got

I've been undressed by kings

and I've seen some things

that a woman ain't supposed to see.......

I've been to paradise,

but I've never been to me.......

Hey, you know what paradise is? It's a lie. A fantasy we create about

people and places as we'd like them to be.

But you know what truth is?

it's that little baby you're holding

it's that man you fought with this morning

the same one you're going to make love with tonight

that's truth, that's love.........

Sometimes I've been to crying for unborn children

that might have made me complete

but I.....I took the sweet life

I never knew

I'd be bitter from the sweet

I've spent my life exploring

the subtle whoring

that costs too much to be free....

hey lady......

I've been to paradise......

but I've never been to me..........

--Charlene, "I've never been to me"

5:24 p.m. - 2003-08-15

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